Saturday, August 6, 2011

I Can't See Clearly Now, The Rain is Not Gone

I'm feeling different shades of haze these days. There are things and sub-things rolling around like marbles in my head not ready to be complete thoughts yet.


A new school year
   ready?
   not ready?
Downshifting from an exhausting and emotional summer
   missing people
   processing thoughts and feelings
   learning from circumstances, some made, some given to me
Slap-me-in-the-face change
   friends that moved away
   a little boy who's gone forever but so NOT forgotten
   a new boss
Mixing up of groups
   new people
   old people in new places
   new friends?
Transitions
   what's important to learn?
   what am I missing?
   we are all experiencing it, am I showing grace?
Ministry
   what does it look like this year?
   wanting to do everything and nothing at the same time
   leading worship tomorrow, feeling very nervous for some reason
Next year
   staying?
   going?
   where and why?


I am so very happy to be home. I'm just feeling all jumbled up inside. And not in a depressed, moody way. More in a life-is-awesome-but-I-can't-see-anything-clearly sort of way. I'm quite sure it has to do with jet lag and adjustments and Jesus, all rolled into one. I plan to take some time today to rest and pray and spend extra time in the Word. Oh and shop for the typhoon party.


Seriously? A typhoon?




       
  

3 comments:

Karen said...

love you friend...

Abs said...

I feel the same way. It's super hard to deal with, isn't it? I'm hoping once the school year actually gets started then I won't feel like my brain and heart are scrambled eggs.

Katrina Custer said...

I saw that typhoon headed your way. Stay dry! And I can relate to all the changes and mixed-up feelings they create. Our Middle School moved campuses over the summer, and we get a new boss this year, too. Here's to the every changing international world we call "home."